Triad Camping

31 May 2009

Someone Said That? Fun ‘Round the Campfire

Posted by Terry under: car camping .

Many people don’t hit the open trail for backpack camping or even go car camping because they are scared of boredom. Well, to some, nature can be a bit boring, if you get tired of natural beauty, animals, birds and trees, there’s always jokes. We’ve got the remedy for ennui that can overcome your camp. Here are some of the best campfire jokes and one-liners we could find after hours of scouring the Internet. Print this off and take it with you so you can be part of the anti-boredom squad the next time you sit around the fire pit.

Here are some tips left by campers on comment cards for the US Forest Service, collected from various sources, including lovetheoutdoors.com:

• The trails need to be wider so people can walk while holding hands.
• Ban walking sticks in wilderness. Hikers that use walking sticks are more likely to chase animals.
• All the mile markers are missing this year.
• Found a smoldering cigarette left by a hourse.
• Please avoid building trails that go uphill.
• Too many bugs and leeches and spider webs. Please spray the wilderness to rid the area of these pests.
• Please pave the trails so they can be plowed in the winter.
• Need more signs to keep the areas pristine.
• A McDonald’s would be nice at the trailhead.
• The places where trails do not exist are not well marked.
• [There are] too many rocks in the mountains.

From the same and other sources, here are some funny camping tips:

• When using a public campground, a tuba placed on your picnic table will keep the campsites on either side vacant.
• Effective January 1^st, you will have to enlist in the Swiss Army to get a Swiss Army knife.
• A two-man pup tent does not include two men or a pup.
• When camping, always wear a long sleeved shirt. It always gives you something to wipe your nose on.
• Bear bells are a great idea. The hard part is getting the bells on the bear.
• You can compress your sleeping bag by running over it with the car.

Here are some quotes, said by real hikers and campers (collected from forums):

• I’m sure that’s not poison Ivy
• I’m sure these mushrooms are edible
• Snakes? Naw…not to worry….never saw one where we’re stayin’
• Why do they put trees right where everybody wants to walk
• The ice sure looks Thick enough to skate on
• No need for reservations, this place NEVER fills up
• You should have been here last week, the fish were really biting
• What time of year do deer turn into moose?
• When can you snow shoe in the park?
• Do you get lightning here when it storms?
• The sign said fish, but there ain’t any
• How far is eight miles?
• You should be OK, it doesn’t look that bad
• There’s just one more hill to climb. It’s flat after that.
• I thought you brought the toilet paper?
• Where is everyone?
• Where are the porta-potties?

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